My number one piece of advice for new parents, as a father of five children

I don’t have all the answers, but this helped me immensely

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

This is the thing I tell new parents when they talk to me about the struggles they’re going through adjusting to life with kids. I don’t have all the answers, but this has worked for me as a father of five children.

Often, the issues I hear about are tied to new parents trying to hold onto life as they knew it before kids. We don’t need to abandon that old life and the things we enjoyed. We just need to adjust and build some of those things around our new life, rather than tying to build a baby around our old life.

Much of this is about the way we look at time

When we had our first child, I kept many of my old routines going. I wanted time to write, enjoy movies, play guitar or video games and watch sports.

I’d stay up late, after the baby went to bed, until 11 p.m., midnight or 1 a.m. That period of quiet in the house, even after we had our second child, felt like my time, which is important to have. I spent it with my wife or did other things once she fell asleep.

Here’s the problem: when you go to bed at midnight or 1 a.m. and a baby wakes up at 3 a.m., you’re a total zombie. Well, I am at…